Birth Mother

Although the term "birth mother" is sometimes used to describe a pregnant woman during the process planning to place her child with an adoptive couple, a birth mother more often refers to a woman who has raised a child through the nine months of pregnancy and has already placed a child with an adoptive family. It is also used to refer to a biological mother in any other adoption circumstance. The necessity to distinguish between parental roles usually occurs after a birth mother's parental rights have been terminated and an adoptive mother assumes parental rights to the child.

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What brings women to decide to place their child is usually for the best interest of the child. The woman may be making the decision because she doesn't have the resources to care for the child or she doesn't want the child to be brought up by a single parent. She may also be too young to raise a child alone or she may have educational or professional goals that would be greatly affected by the birth and raising of a child. Because placement of a child is a life-long and life-changing experience that a woman must make a nine-month commitment to, many women experience vastly different pre- and post-placement emotions and perspective that range from doubt, to grief and guilt. The experience can be especially difficult if she is young and felt pressured during the placement process. Many states have laws that regulate the period of time after placement that adoptive parents can cover counseling expenses or the kind of pre-placement expenses they can pay for. Although many women feel powerless during the adoption process, the law and most of the adoption community work their hardest to empower young mothers.

For many women, placing a child with an adoptive family is a life-long commitment that they may find themselves reflecting on at times that would be important in the child's life. It can be confusing, particularly later in life, so understanding what it means to be a birth mother early on, such as statutory rights pre- and post-placement, the possibility for an open adoption, and the potential for search and reunion when the child is a legal adult are all considerations that can make being a birth mother an easier role.